Summertime Sadness..

thid

Sometimes in a life’s journey you sit and pause for a while, you ask yourself what exactly do you want from your life? Where exactly are you leading? What exactly the future holds for you? You know, nothing is worst than the realization that you’re leading your life in an absolutely wrong way. That you are deceiving yourself. That you’ll be regretting it later and you’re sure about that yet you continue to do it. Because you like doing it. Because you’ve turned numbed to tears. Because you love failures and destruction as you’ve seen souls getting destroyed. Because life is unfair and unjust and just very cruel as it blows you apart at times.

I know that people have worst than me. I know that they have uglier, shittier and very difficult lives. I know that their wounds are intense and deeper than mine. I know that they might not be as blessed as I am and I am way better than many but still, I too, am a human. I have my own problems, my own troubles and my own worries. They might be too minor and insignificant in others’ view but very huge for my fragile being and they are potent enough to blow apart my peace of mind, hold me in melancholic depression and haunting nostalgia and upset me for hours, days and months filling my life, heart, soul with utter sadness. You know sometimes you can not give reason for your melancholy and depression. It is just that much of a secret. Sometimes the sudden prick of nostalgia ache too much. And it takes you to the bitter fact about the existence of few people you never wanted to have around. About those you never liked to spend your time with or never wished to have your sincerity, loyalty and honest intentions. But then again that is why we call them as memories. The permanent imprints. The scars. The forever reminders…

They say everything could be shared with people. The right ones. The close ones and you’ll get off the burden. But I know well that certain things can not be shared. Same as certain things can not be written. Same as certain songs can not be sung. And certain sighs can not be heard. Yeah.. THAT way.. same. Because all the things couldn’t be shown. As they are just too sacred or too precious or too dark or too deep or too intense to be told. They can not be be revealed. They remain unknown. And go away with the person’s soul and some things are better to be left untold.

It is summertime sadness.. Life is slow and melancholy is woe.. but this too shall pass as it is one of those days and they told me nothing is constant. Not even the constant itself. The brightest day was only followed after the darkest night and the silent tears were turned into heartening giggles. Sometimes you fail in prioritizing the priorities. And the life leads in an absolutely wrong direction but then again, light leads you to the home, my child. Sometimes the lemons life throws at you are way too much to handle but then again, the real bliss lies in the bitter sweet.

So take a deep breathe and rely your back on the wall of hope for it won’t betray you like the living beings… And this,

“I have lost friends, some by death…others by sheer inability to cross the street.”

It sums up my take on life.. But still people got over things and life had a way to add day after day. But you don’t know me and neither do you know my story so you’ll be a listener who’ll listen to the tale and move one.

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17 thoughts on “Summertime Sadness..

  1. Great post! Your tale will be like only a souvenir in the end of the summers… Love this line. “And the silent tears were turned into heartening giggle”

    • THANK YOU, Neeraj. *Hugs Back* , love. I miss your awesome self and the even beautiful posts. Shall catch around soon.
      Hope that you are doing well and life is treating you good. Love for the land and people across border.
      Bless you! x

  2. Oh. Hira.
    I know what that meant.
    Because I’ve been through it. Even if I haven’t seen that an extreme level which you have, but still, the problems stand, the glances reach deep, and the words wound nerves again.
    Melancholy, sadness, the gloomy summer, that’ll all pass.
    You just need a change,
    Not any optimistic advices.
    It’ll get better. And if it’s not, than maybe you don’t want it to, Isn’t that true?
    Because chaos and panic and gloominess are interrelated. And they are addictive.

    Still, I hope and pray that everything gets better for you, for me, for our country.
    Love you.
    *Sobs*

  3. Hey,Hira. I don’t what ails your beautiful soul or if it is just a summertime sadness.But everything gets better with time.It helps if you can write your thoughts,the secret songs of your heart just need. to be poured out.I’ve found even in times of great tristesse books,music and coffee helps,even when friends cant.Neverlose hope and have faith that it will get better.Just give it time. Meanwhile,have a hug and a kiss . And now try for smile.

  4. Hey Hira..I don’t know what ails your beautiful soul or if it is just a summertime sadness.But know this,dear. there are people out there who are sympathetic if they cannot be empathetic.I’ve found that music helps along the way to the recovery of spirit & strength.I don’t know you & can therefore only imagine what caused you to be sad. Or what makes you happy…I know that depression as well as anti-depressants,pain and pain-killers all are addictive.Happiness seldom is.We are always too afraid to be really happy.But as they :’As good time passes so does the bad’.
    In the meantime, have a hug and a kiss.And hope.Never lose hope.Have faith,give it time.And try for a smile.

    p.s.-I know that some things cannot be shared in any form .I’d suggest you try painting.It is cathartic.If you can’t write about it,paint.Trust me,it’ll help.Does not matter whether you are good or bad at it.Pour all your secrets and all the emotions on a blank canvas.It works.

  5. Such a cold post, loved it. and well may be it helps you a bit
    “Life is about experiences and the bad ones make you better and you learn from them. also if you didnt have bad then you cant ever really appreciate good things. Cheers.

  6. I am blown away by the beauty with which you gave words to those feelings most of us are weary to share. It could not have been said in more better way. It was so very welk written, moving and relateble. You have an amazing gift and I’m sure it helps you to get away from all things nasty.
    Amazing job Hira! Keep touching those hearts with your beautiful words.
    Loads of love!

  7. Excellently expressed! In the highs and lows of life, some lows seem to last a little longer, are a little harder to handle. But, as you yourself have said, this too shall pass. You are stronger than this, I know. Beautifully said and thoroughly relatable. Feel better soon, you wonderful, wonderful person. 🙂 ❤

  8. Well… well written. Someone who can write their feelings about their feelings, is already equipped with enough arsenal to beat their troubles, so you don’t need any advice, specially mine. 😉

    Keep writing. How many times have I told depressed souls to keep a blog/journal. I wish they would listen.

    I am more then sure you will have your good days. Cheerios.

  9. You truly have the gift of brilliantly and beautifully expressing those feelings which most of us can’t even think of putting into words. I have been there and i can understand what you felt you situation & mine may be different but i can understand. There comes a phase or i’d say phases of life when words like ‘This shall too pass’ don’t sound good to ears and you want to listen to it. Those phases knock one down on their knees but they do pass but not without scaring us.

    *HUGS* I know you are really strong & an amazing person =D Love you ❤

  10. The door to sadness, always will lead to another where happiness will dwell! I have not forgotten you dear sister! Had a rough last two months and moved from one state to another, it sapped my strength, physically and mentally, but I am trying to catch up with all the bloggers I spiritually embrace and love! Hugs and blessings Hira!

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